hope of renewal

just talked to my mom.

she told me a sad story about a young life lost, a young man gone much too soon--too much life ahead. somehow part of me thinks it is unfair. so much life gone, wasted, in one split second.

but as tragic as it is, stories like the one i just heard serve as constant reminders to covet each day, each moment, each memory.

i've been having trouble with motivation. either i've caught a serious bug of senioritis or my brain is full--i am assuming it is the former. my hours blur together into unproductive nothingness. my days are hardly remembered because not much gets accomplished. and so my memories are left hanging, floating at the mercy of the wind.

i opened my Bible tonight during Bible Study and found a little blurp i had written inside when i bought it this summer:

Purchased with hope of renewal.

ahhhh. what a refreshing word: renewal. something i need right now, something i want right now....something that i haven't asked God for yet.

my lathargy is taking a toll on my life; my schoolwork, my daily life, even my floating memories. i know that God is the only One who is capable of that renewal, capable of taking my broken life and repairing all the pieces, capable of curing this case of senioritis, and capable of leading me along the path He has planned. i just have to ask. i just have to say the word.

and when i say that word, i know my life will turn around. each hour will be important, each day significant. i will be living for each day--not through each day. i will be able to cling to my memories, save them from the wind, and i--finally--will be renewed.