Monday, January 09, 2006

hallelujah

i realized tonight that this blog has become more of a soul-bowl than anything else--a place where i silently spill my heart with no knowledge of who is reading on the other side. this wasn't my original intent...it was to serve as more of a daily record; something to look back on and see growth and change. but it has become more than that; it has become a vessel, an outlet, where i feel ultimately comfortable giving the world a glimpse of my heart. it's something new for me--vulnerability, i mean. but, as the old adage goes, sometimes you have to let yourself go in order to get yourself back. so i am letting go, letting loose, and totally feeling the return. it has never before been as real to me as it is now. so thanks, to whomever out there is reading; thanks for being on the other side, reading in between the lines of my heart-song.

my Bible is open next to me right now. 2 Corinthains is staring me in the face. and i totally hear a mumble from God--i just can't quite make out what He is saying. i feel like He is trying so hard to squeeze something out of me--something entirely foreign to my being. it is like a rumble just before an earthquake--a warning sign that something big is coming. but whatever it is, i am confident that God will open doors and pad the floors (reference 2 Cor 2:12-13)...making it evermore easy for me to sing His praise.

Who can hold the stars
And my weary heart?
Who can see everything?
I've fallen so hard
Sometimes I feel so far
But not beyond your reach
I could climb a mountain
Swim the ocean
Or do anything
But it's when you hold me
That I start unfolding
And all I can say is
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever's in front of me
Help me to sing hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever's in front of me
I'll choose to sing hallelujah
[Hallelujah, Bethany Dillon]

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